Wednesday, December 24, 2014

Can I See You Again?

We barely knew each other, then we met.
A single day I won't ever forget.
It was raining, but you didn't care.
We split the bill and it sounds fair.

You smiled,
You laughed,
You asked me,"What's going on?"
You gave it up to me,
You prayed,
You told me to move on.
You figured me out.
We were so close, we were cold.
As the time passed by, the moment was gold.

I was worried,
About my first impression,
About how was I look and how I dressed,
About how I smell,
About how I not to get nervous,
And you figured it out, as well.

Toss aside the loneliness and the pain,
When can I see you again?

Monday, December 8, 2014

Chapter IV -What Love Is-

-------15 May 2011, when I was still on my way moving on from Nova, there was a girl named Zoey. In fact she was already in my attention even before I met nova. But what I saw that she was flirting on me, and be with other guy in just ONE MONTH. Hurting, isn't it? What confused me more that she had crush on me while I was still with Nova. And guess what? She got me. That day. I started to talk to her again and we were confessing each other that she had a crush on me and finally we dated on 2 June. CRAZY, isn't it? I didn't know what happened to me, did I just want to revenge her or I really love her but what I feel couldn't even compare with my love to Nova. And one day she told me that she was not a virgin.
-------18 August 2011, "I have to tell you something, Chie. I'm not a virgin. I know I should told you before." I paused,"I'm really sorry, and for the past, when I dated him and wasted you, I'm really really sorry. I'm cheap." she cried. I'm shocked. I hugged her,"I love you, Zoey." and from that day, we spent our ordinary days just like a couple and she always smiled and laugh but I know deep inside her heart, she was not into it at all. Until one day she talk to me,"I'm not worthy for you, Chie. You're a great man and you don't deserve me. I was wrong not to choose you back then. I regret what I did." "You shouldn't say that. It was your past and you get your second chance. I'll always by your side no matter what." "That's so nice of you, Chie. That's why I loved you and that's why I loved you. But this is not right. It feels right but it's not right. To me. Please go and forgive me, Richie. I wanna take it back before it all went wrong." after a long conversation we broke up. With a goodbye kiss. Love is not about your statuses, not about your virginity. It's about how you feel it and how you do it. not about your nation or your race. not about how charming is your face. But truly what I thought was,"How was it to be betrayed? TWICE?"
-------Each night since the day I met Trixie we always sing together on the veranda. 2 August 2012, when we kissed,"This is not right. This is not right." "What is it?" "I don't know. It just feels not right. I'm sorry, Trixie." I walked to my room and jumped into my bed, thinking of everything and then go to sleep. I thought of Nova, Zoey, and Trixie. Makes me don't want to involved in something with women. You never have to ask why my relationship with Nova didn't work. Same old answer: Long Distance relationship. Now she continues her school to college. She was so angry when I told her that I want to travel the world. I don't have to mention why, do I?
-------3 weeks after I met Norman. Almost one month. Still no improvement, I'm frustrated. Norman doesn't show me her disappointment but I know he is disappointed. I threw myself on the park bench and light a cigarette. I'm tired. Until then a woman shows up,"Excuse me, is there any space beside you to me to sit?" Weirdo, can't you just use a simpler language? "Oh sure, please." She looks like a salary woman. A success woman in an office suit. But I don't care what she wears or even what she does."Cigarette addict, I bet? You know, one cigarette contains......*mumbling about the danger of cigarette*" I hate being told by everyone or being yelled. Who the hell is she to have rights to mumble in front of me like that? "Okay, okay I get." I throw my cigarette to the ground and stomp it."Hmmmpppph, you haven't change even a little bit, Richie." She shocked me. She's someone who made herself my first love. She's the one who filled my teen age. She's the one and my only, Nova! "Nova, what the hell are you doing here?!?!" "Still the same Richie. Cigarettes and Rude Words. I came here to meet you, no other reason, duh!" "Re... Really?" "HAHAHAHA and still the same old Richie."